My enemy Katie remains. UGH

CRUMBLE UPDATE

Overall the Crumble is pretty good. Very simple, two different kinds of apple, with sugar spread on them, covered with a crumble topping made of flour, sugar, butter and cinnamon.

It needs a bit more sugar and the apples could be made a little more fancy, but overall a nice Sunday treat!

Updates

• I passed my masters!!! Actually did pretty well on everything grade-wise. Onto the next source of panic, getting my visa easily!
• A week from Monday I start my journey home by flying to Dublin and then to America the next day!
• I got a killer deal at the 4 star Dublin Airport Hilton- ca ching!
• I just made some crumble... we'll see how it turns out...
• I bought a supa cute purse at the Clarks outlet yesterday. They had hardly any shoes in my large size :( Oh well, I need to save money.
• I dyed my hair "dark plum" because I felt like I needed a change. Saucy.
• I went to Clapham fireworks the second year in a row on Friday. Learned that Clapham is painfully far from GG.

Eeek I'm SO excited to be homeeeeee. Hopefully it all goes smoothly!

SHIT

BYE KATIE

WAGNER FOR THE WIN

Also, apologies readers, this week has been a busy one. But I'm doing nothing today besides reading the paper and getting a bagel, so plenty of time to bloggg.

One of the Most Symbolic Dreams EVER

Last night I had a dream that SCREAMED meaningful symbolism. So in the dream, I was in a rundown council estate that was somehow my new family home, it was disgusting. My Mom, Taylor, and grandparents were there. And they gave me a package with a butterfly in it, but I opened it incorrectly and the butterfly died. But it had skin and a skeleton, and the skin was black and almost furry, with huge antennas, kind of a goth scary butterfly. It's skeleton was terrifying looking though and I kept seeing it in the dream.

Then my mom was mad at me, but my family seemed to be really into butterflies. The final moment came when I walked into my room and my bed was covered in caterpillars at various stages of development. I freaked out bc they were gross and made my mom get them off the bed.

So according to Dream Moods Dictionary,

To Dream of a rundown building means:

"To see a building in ruins or damaged, indicates that your approach toward a situation or relationship is all wrong. You need to change. Your own self-image may have suffered and taken some blow."

To Dream of dead butterflies me (don't agree with this one... I'll explain later):

"To catch or kill a butterfly, suggests that you are being too superficial"

To dream of Caterpillars means:

"To see a caterpillar in your dream, signifies a stage in your own personal growth and development where you are on your way, but have not yet reached your goal."

Sooo my interpretation is that the dead scary butterfly and rundown house represent old ways of thinking and old dreams I had that I'm holding onto for too long/ that are hopeless. They never took flight and they never will. The caterpillars in all different stages of development probably symbolize the new dreams/new life path that is currently growing in my life, not ready to reveal itself. A life path that may be a little scary, but will ultimately transform into an alive, beautiful butterfly.

Riiiggghhhhhtttttt.

oh anxiety

I've been beyond homesick recently. I miss my family SO much and I miss Rochester, everything about it. Even the snow. I just keep thinking about how wonderful it will be to be home and just lay on my couch and watch tv. That's all I want to do.

The issue is, I won't have a good trip home if I don't receive my masters results, or if God forbid, I fail my masters. That would honestly be the worst thing in the world that has ever happened for me. Not only with 35,000 dollars me wasted, but I'll have to quit my job with hardly any notice, thereby making my employers hate me for life, and then I'll have to sort out my place because I won't be able to get my post grad visa. And I won't be able to go to Northern Ireland for Christmas. Any my life will literally be ruined. Like not kidding.

I don't even know when these results are supposed to come. I though it would be this week but who knows. I can't focus on my life. Like I really cannot. Thanks UCL.

So that's the biggest problem in my life right now. I need to pass and I need to get my visa letter so I can easily apply for my next visa when home. Then I can worry about that.

I know I like London, I just can't focus on that right now. Something in me just tells me that I have to stick it out, I have to be strong because being here is where I need to be at this point in my life. I've put so many things in my life on hold until I find out my results and get my visa. Oh please let me have passed.

I know this post is all sorts of crazy, but It's the main worry in my life now.

And I'm lonely, but I can't focus on that because I NEED TO GET MY RESULTS! I'm just sick of coming home to an unfriendly house, where I have to spend my evenings in my room trying to fill the hours before bed. It's probably not healthy.

Basically, I need this vacation. But, firstly I need to find out about my masters.

I always see a man walking around Golder Green who looks just like Tevye. Well, a fatter Tevye. But it always reminds me of this song. And the second saddest song from Fiddler on the Roof.

Wow I really think they went to Golders Green to fill all the Fiddler on the Roof extra roles. Love the GG.

And the best song in Fiddler on the Roof:

Sorry for all the videos this morning my 5 readers, it's been one of those Sundays.