Thursday 18 November 2010

America vs UK

American Christmas commercial:

British Christmas commercial:

I think the point is clear.

When I first saw the title of this film, I assumed it would be a shitty joke film. Then I saw the cast list and the producers and watched the trailer and my mind changed. Still, ridiculous title/concept right?!!

A dramatic retelling of my journey HOME

Stage 1)
I left work early on Monday and headed to Liverpool St. station. Concerningly (not a word) my boss seemed to not realize I was leaving that day. Oh well! I got to Liverpool and got on the very expensive Stanstead Express. The train was a lot more rundown than I recall, but oh wellll.

Stage 2)
RYAN AIR. Meh it wasn't so bad. Well, It was what I expected. I got a decent seat, sat next to a well dressed Irish man who picked at his teeth/nose constantly. Oh and I checked a bag and it could only be 15kg or like 34lbs, well mine was 16 so I had to remove some shit and it became exactly 15kg wooo. But I then had the heaviest carry on evah ugh. The worst part about Ryan Air for me was the constant ads they play over the announcements, asking if you want to buy a ryan air calendar (hell no), a ryan air scratch card (wtf), a ryan air special edition 5 hour energy (nooo), and so on.

Stage 3)
I got my bag super quick and got my passport stamp from the Guarda. Then I wandered around the parking lot for literally 25 minutes trying to find the correct spot for my airport shuttle. I found it and had just missed the shuttle, meaning I had to wait 45 minutes for the next one. Awful. Several Irish people approached me and asked if I needed help, well that wouldn't happen in England!

Stage 4)
Dublin Airport Hilton. Located about a 15 minute ride away from the airport but whatevah! It was kind of disappointing for a hilton, the bed was super ikea looking and not that comfortable. They did have a nice tea selection. Also there was NO WIRELESS ughhh. Internet detox!

Stage 5)
I wandered around the Dublin airport preflight and headed into the special American departure lounge. Fun fact, I went through customs/American entry clearance in Dublin! And the Border agent was from Buffalo so we had a little chat about Upstate shit. Small world! That was the best part of flying out of Dublin because once I got to New York I didn't have to endure long lines, I just walked through like I was on a domestic flight! Oh also, they checked my bag through to Rochester so I didn't have to pay 25$ holllahhh!

Anyways, so I'm used to flying out of London on huge relatively nice jets. The one out of Dublin was relatively tiny for the distance. Like even the Iceland Air jet I flew was bigger. So because of its size there were NO individual tvs and none of the wifi now on Delta flights. And of course, the movie they showed was one I've already seen. And my laptop only had an hour of battery life. So it was a very very boring flight. And the man behind me started talking to the girl sitting across the aisle from him and he was full of shite. Like I felt so bad for the poor girl, he just went on and on and on. And he was talking sooo loud. ughhhh.

Stage 6)
I had a 3 hour layover at JFK so I bought my first american "meal," a very large iced caramel coffee and a pumpkin donut from Dunkin Donuts. Hollaahhh! Then I bought an American Glamour (so much better than the British one!! Though the British one came with really nice nail polish called Hampstead Heath) and a copy of Real Simple! Aka a magazine for chic 40 year old housewives. I love it! I then got on a tiny tiny tiny plane for Rochester, where we waited on the runway for 30 minutes. And then endured forty five minutes of constant turbulance. And got to the airport and my parents weren't there. So I had to approach a random nice looking girl and say "I live in England, I don't have an American phone or any american money can I please use your phone?" That did the trick and I was then reunited with the parents.


HOMMEEEEEEEE


My second American meal, fyi, was a burger and fries from 5 guys!

Today I go to Buffalo to get fingerprinted for the UK government. Fun times.