Monday, 3 January 2011

Goodbye 2010 Hello 2011


2009 was a pretty dull year, yes I finished uni and moved to England again, but it didn't contain a lot of stories for my future (distant future) babies. I could tell them about my shit job working at Michaels, but besides that, meh. 2010 on the other hand was filled with a plethora of change and heartbreak, the kind that probably set off the transformation process that will turn me into the woman I was born to be, or something.

Really though, emotional trauma seems to be the best tool for transformation. I became soo different my freshman year when the boy I LOOOOVVVVEEEDDDD/ was obsessed with/ never had a chance with for a PLETHORA of reasons (all general themes in the men I like- probably an issue...), decided he hated me (along with my roommate) and left me with no friends and an emotional wreck after telling me off at 3 am one wednesday. I feel like that was the kick that hardened me into a young adult.

Similarly, December was filled with hard things for me. In really all facets of life. But I think the pain I went through/ am still very much going through, will be good for me, will make 2011 into a wonderful year. Everything I did (all the trauma was brought on by me- but they were things I had to do), will help me shake off those old habits and loyalties that were ridiculous. This is all very cryptic I know. But meh. All I know if that after that trauma Freshman year I progressed into a much more confident (in a way...), unique, badass lady and it led directly into many amazing memories. I went from having shit friends who didn't like me into having a group of amazing girls who made my undergrad experience. I even had some romance after all that horribleness. And I think that momentum led me directly into my year at Oxford. But the shit began again a bit at Oxford and just ended last week. By shit I mean, unhealthy cycles of thinking/emotional states in my life. Wow this post is legit crazy.

So essentially, I'm hoping 2011 is very similar. I'm especially hopeful for this month because Jupiter is supposed to be in pisces for a while, which apparently is amazing. Yup.